94-Years-Young Substitute Teacher Tunes to HDMI-3 on First Try!
Volcano Erupts Beneath School; Administrators Recommend Leaving Home Earlier
Lincoln’s Final Letters Reveal Wishes for Big Big Big Chair
Scientists Terrified to Discover Astrology Fake
Honesty No Longer Best Policy
Cooking Classes Will No Longer Be Taught By Eminem’s Mom
Women’s Construction Club Breaks Glass Ceiling in Major Sledgehammer Accident
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The Near True News
The Satirical Student Newspaper of New Trier
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