• New Trier Aims to Preserve History with Time Capsule Filled to the Brim with Liquid Nitrogen, Body Parts
  • One Stop Trev Shop Hides 5 Golden Tickets No One Will Look For
  • Teacher Imagines Students Laughing, Applauding at Joke Made on Multiple Choice Quiz
  • Student has yet to close parenthesis opened long ago, rendering past years an afterthought
  • Teachers Will No Longer Accept Bribes
  • Four-year KW requirement prevents young genius from graduating early
  • 94-Years-Young Substitute Teacher Tunes to HDMI-3 on First Try!
  • Volcano Erupts Beneath School; Administrators Recommend Leaving Home Earlier

The Near True News

Menu
All content by Peter Leutz
Summer 2018: Now a Three Day Weekend!

Summer 2018: Now a Three Day Weekend!

Peter Leutz • March 26, 2017
"We could go to school Sunday through Friday as far I’m concerned. Definitely not Saturdays, though...those are for the boys.”
Load More Stories
Activate Search
The Satirical Student Newspaper of New Trier
Peter Leutz