Halloween Costume Roundup!
The latest Youth Risk Behavior Survey data has identified choosing Halloween costumes as the riskiest decision a New Trier student faces each year. A well-executed Halloween costume has the power to take anyone from a total loser to a weird-looking loser for 3 hours on an October evening! The Near True News’ finest fashion minds have created a list of costume ideas to help you discern what’s trendy, basic, hot, and criminally liable. Happy trick or treating!
- Trevius Maximus: Prepare to be sued for copyright infringement by the Student Activities Department
- Fishing pole: It’s the only way you can make the Bass Fishing Team
- Current US President: Whoever you think it is
- Sexy acorn: You could get sponsored by College Board
- Sheet of homework: Get eaten by a dog at the end of the night
- Privileged child of suburbia: Go as you are
- The New Trier WiFi router: Embody the single greatest failure of the school
- The giant skeleton in the scrounge: Your parents would say it’s too revealing
- Pumpkin: Only if you are a sad basic 5-year-old
- Your favorite school administrator: Cheaper than buying a clown costume
![Photo of Eli Trokenheim](https://neartruenews.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/pexels-mahdi-bafande-7539691-317x475.jpg)
Eli graduated from the Omega One school of Fish Flakes in 1843 with a speciality in tropical freshwater food. He's won the "most medium sized pumpkin"...
![Photo of Ben S](https://neartruenews.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/11/pexels-plato-terentev-5821946-317x475.jpg)
Ben doesn’t think that being random makes things funny, but he does that anyway because actual humor is hard and memes are hip now. He is a major political...