• School bell replaced with Bavarian yodeler
  • Economic inflation sadly not factoring into GPA inflation
  • New Trier cuts costs by crowdsourcing student knowledge instead of using teachers
  • APUSH students demand change to Americentric curriculum
  • Noun adverbally verbs whilst verbing a noun.
  • Near True News social media consultant faces backlash over TikTok thirst trap on official account
  • New Trier lowers stress by no longer asking about it
Annie v

Annie v, Writer Emeritus

Author of the smash hit Buzzfeed article "tell us your social security number and we'll tell you what mistake you're making with bacon", brief tenant of the Motel 6 in Rutland, Vermont, Annie now comes to you from Winnetka a laptop near Winnetka. Outside of writing, she enjoys pretending she reads novels, pretending she cooks, and pretending she goes on long walks with the dog she does not have.

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The Satirical Student Newspaper of New Trier
Annie v