• Scrounge chairs auctioned off for $650,000,000
  • Tap dancing flash mob tramples students; Advisery discussions ensue
  • Oil discovered on New Gym excavation site; land sold to ExxonMobil
  • Record-low commencement attendance as seniors PX from graduation

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New Trier’s New “Negative Tolerance” Policy Encourages Stupid Nonsense

New Trier’s New “Negative Tolerance” Policy Encourages Stupid Nonsense

Max P
May 17, 2023
Deep Dive into History!

Deep Dive into History!

Abby P
May 17, 2023
Human Hamster Wheels, Sweatshops Among Changes to Kinetic Wellness Curriculum

Human Hamster Wheels, Sweatshops Among Changes to Kinetic Wellness Curriculum

Caleb S and Shirley X
May 24, 2022
New NT Game Reserve Causes Chaos

New NT Game Reserve Causes Chaos

Abby P
May 17, 2022
New club rebels against the reds

New club “rebels against the reds”

Ben S
November 2, 2021
New Trier Crime Report

New Trier Crime Report

Annie von Dohlen and Eli Trokenheim
November 2, 2021
Eek, a boy! New gender-segregation programs announced

Eek, a boy! New gender-segregation programs announced

Eli Trokenheim and Annie von Dohlen
November 2, 2021
2019 Field Trip Report

2019 Field Trip Report

Eli Trokenheim and Annie von Dohlen
March 5, 2021
Hot New Products!

Hot New Products!

Caleb Sim and Eli Trokenheim
March 5, 2021
Freshmen: The Hunt for Untold Riches Calls On You!

Freshmen: The Hunt for Untold Riches Calls On You!

Annie von Dohlen
March 5, 2021
An incoming freshman learns how to grip her bow for maximum killing efficiency.

Freshman English’s Big Fat Greek Bloodbath

Eli Trokenheim
March 5, 2021
New Drop Off Policy Drives Parents Bonkers

New Drop Off Policy Drives Parents Bonkers

Maggie von Dohlen
November 10, 2020
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